Things have changed, and the maid of honor duties aren’t that traditional anymore: they are supposed to support the bride in many ways, but not to escort her from spirit anymore like it was said and believed.
It means they have way more duties than before, which makes this checklist quite extensive.
Were you invited to be one, or are you looking for instructions to give your official “hand of the bride”? Both ways, you can learn the most common maid of honour duties from now on.
What are the duties of a contemporary maid of honor?
In short, the most common responsibilities are related to event design and management – it’s like they are the bride’s private party promoter, really.
Not all brides are into bachelorette parties and bridal showers, but most of them are and they recurrent pre-wed events. The rehearsal dinner requires active engagement from both the bride and the groom, but a maid of honor can also take part, putting it on their checklist as well.
Since those are private events held to please a single person above the others, usually the best maids of honor are those who are intimate with the bride, and:
- Have a good taste, in common with the bride – or at least knows how to identify and reproduce their preferences;
- Are in a position they can talk to each other often to set things and make sure every choice is following the bride’s planning, event theme, etc.
- Knows how to keep secrets – from other people and sometimes from the bride.
Yet, they are not only party promoters. Check the list below to see what else a maid of honor can expect to do (or you can expect yours to do to you) before the event.
- Keep you company on the wedding dress shopping day + provide good advice on what to wear. Wedding cake shopping is also a possibility, but a bride wants always to keep it a secret.
- Help choose the venue decor (if it’s necessary, even help make it with DIYs, etc.)
- Help develop a website to promote and organize the event. Send e-mails to guests, and checking replies can also be a great help. Keep that in mind.
During the event, things get a bit easier if the maid of honor isn’t a shy person:
- Help the bride keep the schedule.
- Walk down the aisle and hold the bouquet.
- Be a front person to guests’ questions.
- Be a model and set the mood after the first dance!
Finally, after the party, there will be a moment when the couple will need witnesses to officialize their union. Keep in mind the bride’s parents and/or bride’s maid are the best people to do it.
Keep company on the wedding dress shopping day
If you’re the one in charge of being a maid of honor, be conscious you’re highly requested this day.
In cases where it’s only the bride and their vendors who are choosing, many things can go wrong: it is a sensitive and emotional day for the bride, but a very rational and professional day for a vendor.
In practice, their ideas probably won’t match that well, and you’re the one to mediate and find the right point between the emotional and rational approaches.
Besides, if you’re the bride’s maid of honor, very likely this person trusts your opinions and thinks you’ll be useful on this day.
Finally, you can take photographs to help the maid feel safe and figure out what they will look like on pictures on her day. This day she’ll build more confidence and probably get less anxious since they sort of have a glimpse in the mind of their final look.
Choose and Decor the venue
Do some research with the bride before going to the first venue you’ll be visiting, so you both have a better understanding of what styles to look for and what the bride wants the decoration to be like.
Again, you can take pictures to have a better comprehension of a final result on the big day, and you can start wondering about furniture, DIYs, and other decor aspects beforehand.
Take into consideration:
- If here will have a reception, and if it needs a second venue.
- The number of guests and the space available.
- The budget.
- Parking lot and the guest experience.
Develop a Website
Keep in mind the primary function of a website is to keep the guests informed and help them plan their schedules and transportation. If you don’t have it perfect and clear, every single one of them will send the bride, at some point, questions about the place, time, wishlist, transportation, cost, or another topic that is described on the wedding invitation or have yet not been decided.
Therefore, it is imperative the website is simple and focused on answering the most frequent questions wedding guests ask.
If you’re a developer, programmer, or designer, even better! You can make it look unique and functional. If you’re not, yet you need to help her do it to avoid headaches – and trust me, creating a website is something most brides postpone and regret not doing earlier.
There are plenty of tools to create websites quickly, with beautiful templates and simple page builders. Look for an affordable one and, if the bride won’t make it, hands-on!
Again, the bride’s maid of honor is there to give support. There are plenty of ways a maid of honor can be helpful, and these were the most recurrent and, at some point, traditional ones. Feel free to add or remove any item on the list and make sure to be constantly communicating with the person that is counting on you.